[THIS IS ALL TALES! Read it if your bored, or something.]
Screencaps used for this post can be found here and here.
Tales of Symphonia OVA Part 3 came out a while ago. This one is definitely better than the second, which was pretty boring. This one has, heaven forbid, plot! A decent amount, too. Now I shall briefly(-ish) summarize it. With pictures. Shiny pictures.
Okay, it starts with Kratos being all...Kratos-y
"..."
Okay, How the hell did he get up there?
And, cut to Mr Main Character;
...Best. Night-Watchman. Ever. Yeah.
"Colette??"
JUMP
I am too cool to be your daddy. O.o
"You suck! You just let her wander off like that??"
"Lloyd, you're just cranky because you haven't had you morning coffee yet."
"Aw Yeah."
...Why is the freakin' sky green??
She can't feel anything O.o
Hot Coffee mod! ...
(That was bad...)
"Are you sure you're alright?"
Like she's been sleeping >.>
So begins Lloyd being Emo.
"I'll stay awake with you, even if I have to tape my eyelids open!"
Okay, two things wrong with that:
1) Did they even have tape back then?
2)Knowing you, Lloyd, you'd just fall asleep with your eyes open.
'Dude, I made her laugh! Might get laid...might get laid...'
I got 'em for months.
You know what? I have never once seen my reflection in my coffee.
It's too hot to drink, yet...
...She can hold it just fine with both hands?
"WTF?"
Or, Lloyd begins chewing Colette out about her not eating/sleeping/feeling.
"You always smile like that when you lie!!"
Colette. He cares for you. You stupid Bimbo.
Fish! ^.^
New! K-tel Pile O Rocks!
*slip*
"Need a hand?"
Environments in this anime are freaking amazing.
...
*whistles LOTR theme*
\Aww, Genis has hill troubles too.
"FAI-TO!!"
...Erm...'fight'?
"I am not allowed to smile. I am Teenager." (Yay Dad)
Flashback from the night before;
"Is it that hard for you to trust me??"
ARG! POSSESSED COLETTE POSSESSED COLETTE!!
"It's just...I thought that this is what it means to be an angel..."
...See, Colette? Look what you did! You made Lloyd cry. I hope you're happy.
"You're so stupid!!"
Or, if you were to ask H-G Subs for that line;
"You're so Baka!!"
Skipping opening...
Faraway Village - Luin
DESIANS DESIANS DESIANS DESIANS
"Mommy! Mommy!"
"Hey, Frank, let's go chop up small children!"
"Okay, Bob!"
Poor kid :'(
"Muahahaha" Orr...the subordinate's equivalent.
"Kya!"
"OMFG WHY IZ I NOT DEADZ"
Yay! It's Sheena!!
..You know what time it is now...
It's Ninja Skillage time!!!
"Are you okay..?
"RUN!!!"
Hey, I'd be scared too, kid.
Corrine :D
"...Fuck this game."
"Sheena~!"
"Gah, the hell with it."
The morning after...
"Jeez, I got hammered last night."
Raine and the crew.
The ruins of the village.
Sheena and Corrine
"Why did you help me??"
"..."
"Ask Them."
Kratos returns with all he found of survivors.
"!?"
"Damn those Desians, how can they do such horrible things!!"
"Saruman attacks from Isengard...Sauron from Mordor..."
"Kratos, what the hell are you talking about??"
Lloyd tries to make friends.
"Bite me, Monkey Ears."
"LOL HAY GUYS SHE'S ANTISOCIAL"
"LOL"
O.O
Anyhow, let's cut to the Human Ranch.
Hey, those weren't there before.
Ha. searchlights.
Hey, look, an Exsphere
Dude, this is like Star Trek: TNG for some reason o.O
Oh, shit.
*copy, paste* Oh, Shit.
GODDAMN thats one ugly sunnuvabitch
LEVEL ONE BATTLE STATIONS
WARP FIVE, NUMBER ONE
(...Damn you, Saturday afternoons at Dad's...)
"Dude, they're over here!"
Jeez, who could that be?
Oh, right.
"Why did you have to press the button?"
"I thought it was to turn off the security system!!" (This reminds me of something that would happen in TOTR >.>)
"What a clumsy assassin [/game title reference]"
"A'ight, Fuck y'all!"
"Shikigami! Ni!"
"Souren!!" (Don't ask me what that means.)
Paper...Digivolve to...
WIND SHIKIGAMI :O
That pwns a bunch of Desians
Then Kratos kills Desians.
And so does Lloyd.
Meanwhile, at the Jumbotron
Watoosh!
"LOL HAY GUYZ ITZ MAI EXFERE PROJETX"
This is what the inside of a Desian Ranch looks like.
Pick a door...any door...
"Hey Lloyd! Look! A Cliché!!"
"What? Where?"
See? Nobody's stupid enough to dive under that closing door and get separated from the rest of the group.
...
Shut up.
Lloyd gets ready to enter the ominous room up ahead.
Now it cuts back to the rest of the Group, with Raine using a computermarer.
Desian keyboards are weird.
Now the cells open (they had glass instead of bars in the game)
"We're saved!!"
Group shot!
Awww, now she's worried about him.
"I'll go look for him."
Great, now Colette's emo too.
"!?!"
Oh, shit.
I know from experience that assorted bodies in tanks is always a sign you're in a bad place.
Like this wouldn't scare the bajeezus out of you, too.
Shit. KVARKVARKVARKVARAHHHH
An exsphere growing on one of the bodies.
Alright, now he's creeped out.
Lloyd looks at his exsphere.
Kvar begins to explain about how the exspheres are made from human bodies...
And how Lloyd's mother was an experimental subject, who escaped, and then he killed her.
"You..."
"You're..."
"You're the son of a bitch..."(Not the actual translation, but sounds cooler >.>
"WHO KILLED MY MOTHER?!?"
Lloyd goes nuts and charges at Kvar.
"I'm not the one who killed your mother."
See those things? Those things are evil little bitches in the game.
Lloyd's still freakin' pissed.
"Your father did."
HATE THOSE GODDAMN THINGS
Yes, Lloyd. Swords block electricity. Especially swords made out of metal.
Kvar starts blowing up the tanks, seeing as he got that damned Angelus Project back.
Sweet Jeebus, it's everywhere.
Told you swords wouldn't work, retard.
Eww, there's biogenitic liquid all over the floor.
Kvar's a faggetsexual.
Kvar talks about how Anna (Lloyd's mother) turned into a monster and how Lloyd's real father killed her.
Wow, that's some baaaad foreshadowing.
And you're enjoying this too much, you demented bastard. He's about to continue talking here, but...
"THAT'S A LIE!!"
"That's a lie..."
"It's all a lie..."
"THATS-"
"-A-"
"-LIE!!"
Lloyd's pissed of out of his mind.
Kvar sticks him in the shoulder.
...
Kvar smokes Lloyd with his..staff..thingy.
o.O
He looks beat to shit, now.
then Kvar stomps on his hand because he's a bitch.
"Don't make fun of my mother and father!"
Lloyd leaves blood on Kvar's uniform.
And he freaks out because he's a bitch.
He's about to kill him when...
"WTF?"
This is when I kicked off my shoes in a fit of Joy.
Sheena gets Lloyd the hell out of there.
This is Kratos' greatest moment in the Anime, Manga, definitely the game, and ANYTHING else.
STAB!!
Right in the freakin' heart!!
And they even keep his line from the game!!
"Feel the pain of those inferior beings..."
"AS YOU BURN IN HELL!!!"
Yes. Yes. Fuck yes. Yes.
And now that bitch is dead.
And I'm ascareded of Kratos when he's mad.
*runz like Char*
Yay! Now they blow up the base!!
lol, That bastard's on fire.
BOUCH!!
And, for some reason, Rodyle and Pronyma are watching from the woods.
And Pronyma's a whore.
Here they all are, gathered back at Luin.
Sheena looks on.
"Are you leaving?"
"You don't want me here, I'm a bad person."
The little girl shakes her head.
And so, Sheena leaves.
Raine and Genis are arguing over...something about magic.
Colette notices that Lloyd and Kratos aren't there.
"Don't talk back!"
She doesn't look concerned.
Great, more Emo Lloyd.
The exsphere.
He mulls over the thing that cost his mother her life...
And decides to chuck it (Why, why, of all things?? Jeez...).
But guess who comes to save to day??
...the Bastard Mercenary!
This is about where my memory of the dialouge gets fuzzy, but I think he says something along the lines of: "If you get rid of the Exsphere, how will you fight the Desians?"
Complete memory lapse here.
Lloyd goes to chuck it again, but,
Kratos stops him.
"Mom died...because of this thing!"
He drops the exsphere. You know, I always thought that they were perfectly round, like a sphere, but they're actually hemi-spheres in the anime. That's a little weird.
Kratos's eye.
Kratos picks up the exsphere, probably because he knows that Lloyd might eventually change his mind.
And he walks away. He's persistent, isn't he? Never giving up after only one try. Nope. Not him.
Lloyd collapses to his knees. (First person to make a crack at that one gets the Eternal Sword shoved through their skull)
Aw, jeez, he's going to start crying again. He cried like what? Once? maybe twice in the game, which is a total of about 80 hours including side quests? This is twice in the space of fifteen to twenty minutes.
Kratos being all "I no show emotion"
He begins to wonder here if what Kvar said was actual true. Which, I'm sad to admit, it is.
Thoda - The Final Seal
I hated this thing also.
Dissapearing monsters. I love RPG clichés.
Colette at the altar, doing the whole Chosen-y thing.
Lloyd trying to copy Kratos. Lloyd failing at trying to copy Kratos.
"It's tough without an Exsphere, isn't it?"
Nice one, Genis.
See? Genis realizes when he has said something stupid.
"It's okay! I'll try and make up for it with my magic!!"
Too late, he's gone into self-pity mode.
Hey, look. It's Remiel.
I hate his very soul.
Colette getting angelified. More so.
Genis and Raine talking to Colette.
Memory lapse here as well.
Lloyd being...self-pity-ful
And Colette joins in on the fun!
Later in the day, Lloyd sits out by a lake or the ocean alone.
Apparently thinking. ...Lloyd? Thinking? That's an oxymoron.
Where they have to go next: The Tower of Salvation.
Something catches his attention.
God, I hate leggings.
Colette looks rather unhappy.
I can't remember any dialouge from this part either.
"Say, Colette? Could you sing that song again? [I totally didnt skip tat part, stfu] It kind of calms me down."
But, she doesn't sing. She just smiles at him.
"Colette..."
"Can't you speak anymore??"
"Say something!!" Etc., Etc., Etc.
Lloyd freaking out sum'more.
Colette takes his hand,
And begins to write.
'Go-Me-Ne'
"'Sorry'?"
She begins to write some more, elaborating what she meant.
Oh, for chris'sakes.
"I'm Sorry Lloyd, but I don't think I'll be able to sing for you anymore."
You won't be smilin' for long, biatch.
"Stupid, stupid, stupid!!"
"Dammit! I'm so stupid!"
"GODAMMIT!!"
"What the hell is wrong with me?!?"
If you can't get the jist of it, Lloyd is upset at the fact that he was so caught up in his own problems, that he didn't notice Colette's suffering.
Yeah, like that's going to do much.
This is time for that sad 'Awwwww'.
Now it's nighttime.
And there's the Bastard Mercenary.
"We be chillin'"
Lloyd shows up, still in self-pity mode.
Er, Super self-pity mode.
He throws Lloyd back his Exsphere.
Still no expression >.>
It's takes a mintue for him to 'get it' (What? He's dumb.)
The Exsphere glows after he puts it back on.
"LOL HAY SHINIE"
Dude, he looks evil.
And, all magical-like, he's happy again.
"Beat the courage back into me!!"
AGH KRATOS SMILED KRATOS SMILED KRATOS SMILED AHHHH
Lloyd, he's going to kick your ass.
Owned.
ARG STOP SMILING!! KRATOS DOESNT SMILE!!
"LOL IM GUNNA GET MY ASS HANDED TO ME ROFL"
WHY IS HE SMILING O.O WTF?? KRATOS. AURION. DOES. NOT. SMILE.
ITS A SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE!
Lloyd, you suck. You didn't suck in the game, you didn't suck in the manga, WHY do you suck here?
Why are you smiling? You're getting pwn-dizzled!
God, he's going to be pathetic at the Tower of Salvation...
Ha, turn-based >.<
See? He looks mildly cool there. Mildly.
But, Kratos has a +99999999999999999996999999999999999999999999999999 coolness-ess on him.
There's a voiceover by Lloyd here, I have a huge memory lapse as to what it is, but I know that basic point of it; and thats that he promises to protect Colette, no matter happens.
And thus concludes the Episode.
Eh, I'll get an Adventures post up later, like, maybe tuesday. We'll see.
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